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Jean Smart opened up about finding love again on May 6, after losing her husband of 35 years in March 2021. The 74-year-old Emmy winner is now dating an ‘extremely lovely man’ she met at a friend’s party. But getting back into dating after five years was harder than she expected.
🔥 Quick Facts
- Marriage Length: Jean Smart and Richard Gilliland were married for 35 years until his death in March 2021
- New Relationship: Smart is dating actor Joe Pacheco, age 67, whom she met at a friend’s gathering
- Dating Timeline: Her first date back was ‘so depressing’ and filled with self-doubt after more than 30 years
- Podcast Confession: Smart shared her story on Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ “Wiser Than Me” podcast on May 6, 2026
The Shock of Loss That Changed Everything
Richard Gilliland died unexpectedly on March 18, 2021, following a brief illness from a heart condition. The beloved ‘Designing Women’ actor was 71 years old. Smart recalled the shock of his death felt ‘so unexpected’ in previous interviews, as she initially thought he had COVID. His passing left her devastated after decades of partnership and shared memories.
She has spoken candidly about how losing her life partner of 35 years was ‘indescribable.’ In 2024, Smart revealed she even confronted the medical facility where Gilliland was initially examined, discovering they hadn’t performed an EKG despite his complaints of chest pain. The grief compounded as time passed.
Jean Smart opens up about dating 5 years after husband Richard Gilliland’s death
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Returning to Dating After a Lifetime Together
Five years later, Smart decided to try dating again with surprising results. She met an ‘extremely lovely man’ at a friend’s party, and they began spending time together. However, her first date back was nothing like she anticipated. She described it as ‘insanely demoralizing’ and filled with overwhelming self-doubt about her looks, personality, and conversation skills.
Smart revealed she felt paralyzed by anxiety throughout the entire evening, internally criticizing herself for every word and action. Standing outside her body mentally, watching herself at the dinner table, she worried she was ‘boring’ and ‘less interesting’ than ever before.
Finding Unexpected Hope in New Love
| Relationship Detail | Information |
| Partner Name | Joe Pacheco (Actor) |
| Age | 67 years old |
| How They Met | At a friend’s party |
| Age Gap | 7 years (she is older) |
“It was just so depressing. I remember standing outside myself, watching myself in this restaurant, just going, ‘Oh God, you didn’t just say that. Oh, could you be more boring?'”
— Jean Smart, on her first date after Richard Gilliland’s death
The Moment Hope Emerged from Heartbreak
As the night ended, Smart’s new partner gave her ‘the friendly little side squeeze’ before she disclosed this was her first date in more than 30 years. In that vulnerable moment, she felt ‘older and more unattractive’ than ever. She went home convinced he would ‘never hear from him again’ and felt utterly defeated. Yet surprisingly, they stayed in contact and continued building a connection.
Since then, Smart and Joe Pacheco have made several public red-carpet appearances together at major events in 2026. Most recently, they celebrated the Hacks’ season 5 premiere on April 8 in Los Angeles, looking happy and comfortable together as they held hands and posed for photographers worldwide.
Is Finding Love Again at 74 Really Possible in Hollywood?
Smart continues to navigate this new chapter with both hope and anxiety about the age difference. She confessed that Pacheco is ‘several years younger,’ which makes her feel ‘paranoid’ about their long-term future. However, her vulnerability on Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ podcast inspired countless fans who face similar fears about starting over after loss or advancing age.
The Hacks star proved that second chances at love exist, even after decades of heartbreak and uncertainty. Her honesty about the messy, painful, beautiful journey of returning to dating shows that resilience and openness matter more than age or past trauma.
